I like the way she enables one to see that most of what we think about ourselves, how we define ourselves, has to with the small, painful moments of our lives when someone said something (probably flippant) that became apart of our values, or our ideals, or our life script. Read it to get what the means in a more easily understood way. I know what I am saying, but you may not.
The biggest challenge I realize I am having is to allow my kids to grow up to be who they are, not who I want to shape them to be based on my own issues. Think about it. Check out the book here